Overcoming Fear

We all have fears. Fear is paralyzing. Royals cannot afford to be paralyzed. How on earth would we be able to flaunt all that fabulous couture if we were too afraid to put it on for fear that it might rip? OK, I'm just joking...no one really has a fear of wearing couture. That's just silly. Funny enough, in two days I am jumping out of a plane and I have no fear of that...but maybe that has something to do with the cute SEAL that will be strapped to my back. I do, however, carry a strong fear of sharing my blog with the world. Putting yourself out there is terrifying. It opens you up to criticism. Am I really ready for that? I had a long talk and learned a very valuable lesson from a friend last night. Fear will only hold you back and keep the best part of you away from everyone. Fear will keep your successes at bay and your vulnerability in your face. Fear is death. So, here I am world. The good, the bad and the ugly...the misspelled words and improper grammar...the funny, witty girl who still has (gasp) insecurities. Enjoy.

Je Suis Snob

A friend of mine, not long ago, got her feelings hurt because she was called (gasp) a snob. It got me thinking...is being a snob such a bad thing? A snob denotes someone with taste...someone who does not accept the everyday...someone with high standards and high expectations. In life, we are expected to think that the word snob is an insult. I happen to think of it as a compliment. I'd much rather be known for my high standards than for being (gasp) common. I happen to be a snob of many things...wine, clothing, underpinnings, food, scotch...this, in my opinion makes me a well-rounded and fascinating person. Who wants to be around an individual with bad taste?

(Disclosure statement- I am not condoning becoming one who belittles or excludes non-snobs...I am only encouraging you to embrace good taste and discernment. )

For a bit of light-humored fun...take the following snob tests

http://webcenters.netscape.compuserve.com/love/snobtest.jsp

http://puzzles.about.com/library/quiz/blsnobte.htm

Old friends...

New friends are great...and will no doubt come around as your queendom starts to blossom, however, do not forget that it is your old friends that got you to where you are. They opened your eyes to new experiences, held your head as you cried, quieted your fears and were there when no one else was. Do not neglect or forget those old friends. They are just as important, if not more so, than your new friends. Thanks to Facebook, we all have the opportunity to re-connect with almost anyone. Take the opportunity to rekindle an old friendship or two. You'll be surprised at what you find. As you get more comfortable in your new regal bliss, remember, it is the warmth and love of an old friend that leaves you sleeping well at night...not the fleeting love of a new hanger on who may or not be there tomorrow...

How to Eat

I am a realist. I know that I am going to eat on the run based on the lifestyle I live. You probably do as well. Shame on both of us. I also know that I am not fully enjoying the food that I am eating when on the run. Sure, I taste it, but do I really fully comprehend the flavors, textures and aromas of what I am thrusting towards my mouth? No. As a matter of fact, I'm pretty sure I don't taste it. In our homogenized, microwaved, give-it-to-me-now world, it is desperately important to take those rare moments and enjoy a good, made from scratch meal. So, every once in a while, usually on my day off, I take the time to shop for, cook and enjoy (by myself and in silence) a meal that truly deserves my attention. Maybe a nice hearty minestrone soup with a crusty sourdough bread, a roasted vegetable lasagna and a glass of Chianti or perhaps a smoky ratatouille over Parmesan polenta. Whatever sparks that creative light in me that particular day. After I'm done cooking, I light a candle, place some flowers on the table, breathe slowly and eat. Really eat.

(If you don't know how to cook, now's the time to learn. Find one or two signature dishes that you can call your own. Buy a cookbook that looks interesting and get to it. If you don't believe in the virtues of cooking, watch Julie and Julia, it will change your world.)

Edit Ruthlessly

As my favorite fashion advisor, Simon Doonan (www.simondoonan.net), says...edit ruthlessly. Granted, he was referring to your closet. I am referring to everything...your closets, your cabinets, your refrigerator, your garage...the works. If it does not make you feel absolutely fabulous, get rid of it. There will always be some peasant that will benefit from your castoffs. A queen has no business using a rusted knife, a pilling blanket or an ill-fitting pair of shoes. You deserve nothing less than the best...so why keep it around? If you are to lessen the amount of clutter in your life (more on that later), you need to be blunt. Cut to the quick. Get rid of it. Not only will you feel better when you look in your closets and cabinets and see yourself surrounded by only wonderful things, you will feel the warmth of knowing that you helped someone less fortunate with your supreme generosity.

All Hail the Estate Sale

Now, I know the folks at Peta will not be happy with me (even though I happen to be a vegetarian) but I have a vintage, fur collared, calf length, wool coat hanging in my closet. The wool is a beautiful camel color and the collar is red fox fur...gorgeous and fits like a dream. Wanna know how much I spent on it? $5.00. How did I get such an amazing coat at such an amazing price you might ask? Estate Sale. Now I am sure you all know which neighborhoods in your area are the 'ritzy' ones. Pick up a paper and look for estate sales in those neighborhoods. They are a gold mine of amazingly priced queenly items. I have a brass handled umbrella, tons of vintage silver and linen, velvet throw pillows, you name it. All for a pittance. If you are to truly equip your castle with stately things to make yourself feel absolutely fabulous, hit up one of these darling little gold mines and shop to your hearts content, guilt free. Just do me one favor. Actually use the items you buy. Don't be one of those uptight women who keep everything in a curio case for a 'special occasion'. You are royalty, every day is a special occasion. If your silver tarnishes, polish it. If your vintage linen rips, so what, you barely paid anything for it. Go buy more! Happy Hunting!!

Learning to say "no"

As a child, it's our favorite word. We cry and stomp our feet and scream it at the top of our lungs as soon as we learn it...much to our parents dismay. Why then, as adults, are we so afraid to use it? What is it about this word that makes it so difficult to say???
After nine days of vacation, I just want to go back on another vacation. Every five minutes or so I have another person with another issue, want or need, on top of my already huge mountain of things to do. As a sanity control method, I called my assistant and had him hold all of my calls. Not everything is a fire that needs to be put out right now. Those calls can wait. Those that show up unannounced or without appointment...sorry, I can not be disturbed right now. Please come back when you learn to call in advance. Do I feel like a big bitch doing this? Yes, in a way I do...however, isn't that part of growing up? Learning to stand up for yourself? It's OK to say no. I am still learning this after all these years. I was raised to be nice and agreeable and pleasant but if I am to honestly be queen of my castle...er office, I need to learn to grow up and assert myself. Feelings be damned!